Burma Railway Man: Secret Letters From a Japanese Pow Read online

We are now wearing battledress. What with collars and ties for all ranks and black ebonite regimental badges, it is becoming increasingly difficult to tell the ‘licentious and drunken soldiery’ from the ‘officers and gentlemen’. So much so, that some of the girls on board got into conversation with some privates yesterday. It is very difficult for a short woman to inspect a tall man’s shoulder insignia. Thank God for the civilian suit, which is gradually drawing closer.

  A strange coincidence was revealed when it was discovered that Colonel Toosey had bought his house from the Orbita’s captain in 1936. Toosey was also a well-known figure in Liverpool business circles and the directors of the shipping line sent a cable requesting VIP treatment. This led to much socializing during the voyage, which was also extended to the warrant officers. It was during a bout of liquid relaxation that Charles discovered how close he had come to his much sought after commission.

  Airmail 3 Off Crete 31.X.4S

  My Dearest,

  Rather a happy morning today. The Col and the Adj sent for BSM Ramsbottom (known as Sheepsarse) and myself, and Lt.Col Knight of the Royal Norfolks sent for his CSM, a very decent fellow named Peacock (how biological these names!). When we got down to their cabin, we found a passable imitation of an off-licence, with bottles everywhere and a heap of cracked ice in the wash hand basin.

  What had happened was this. The Captain of the ship had had a cable from the owners at Liverpool saying that among his passengers was a Lt.Co.Toosey RA, who must be shown every consideration, as he was a personal friend of the directors. The first consideration, which our portly Captain showed was, of course, a plentiful supply of Black and White and every other known liquor, all of which came from the supply allowed the officers of the vessel. Passengers, on the other hand, are only allowed a certain ration of beer. Well, we had a very pleasant morning, although I drank more than I like to, but it is very difficult not to do so when in company like this. I expect you find the same thing. I do hope you haven’t developed a craving for alcohol or tobacco, because I have always thought that one of your most charming features was your open-air attitude to life and your power to live your life and enjoy it without the artificial aids which so many have to call in to give them artificial self-confidence and artificial high spirits. And, if one can’t assume responsibility without the help of habitual drinking and smoking – well, it is time to drop it.

  You must excuse this digression, but I have seen men sink to such low depths when, without a smoke and such terrible results of drunkenness, that I now only drink or smoke when socially necessary. People simply do not realise how great a bold a habit can obtain on them.

  Incidentally, during our conversation, the Col apologised for my non-arrival at an OCTU and made the excuse that he had only been in the Regt a month before we sailed and that he was completely overworked during this period. He seemed genuine enough. He is the finest man I have ever met. I have no doubt be would be a Brigadier and probably a Major-General, if he hadn’t been thrown away at Singapore.

  By the time lunch arrived, the good Orbita, so steady up to now, was behaving like a bucking bronco. However, it calmed down after a lazy afternoon in the sunshine on deck and an early night.

  Airmail 4 Approaching Malta 1.X1.45

  Darling Girl,

  The weather is getting colder and the ship is one huge sniff, cough, cold and sneeze. I found two of my people in their bunks at inspection time well away with flu, so I bunged them straight along to hospital. It is dangerous to take risks with malaria sufferers, in view of the likelihood of Blackwater Fever.

  Darling, let’s clear up a point raised in one of your letters. It is about the ‘altering’ business during our separation. I know at first glance a difference in each other might have taken place and is likely – after all, for the last four years you have been mixing with the upper classes and I with the lower – but does this conclusion bear logical examination?

  For the first 25 years of our lives we have been living very much the same lives. We come from similar middle class stock, we come from middle class families, we were both educated at secondary schools. We did similar types of work, we enjoyed similar types of pleasure. Our attitudes towards politics and religion are similar. Is this quarter of a century of similarity going to be completely affected by four years of different living? Of course it isn’t.

  And take another view. One of the most comforting things which your letters have told me is that you are still in close touch with our old friends and acquaintances. What is more, you are hoping to renew those friendships. Would this be the case if you had altered in any way or if some of your acquaintances, since you obtained a temporary commission, had blinded you with the lustre of the upper classes? Of course it wouldn’t. To hear you talking about Iris and Albert, jack Perkins, George Lane and the rest, means that you are still the Louie I love and not a person whose exhilarating experiences of the last four years have gone to her head. To hear you talk about cooking for the family is as balm to my soul.

  And, anyway, I have lived, eaten and slept with Officers for the last 3½ years, less 7 months when I did an officer’s job.

  You see, I am sure that we shall come together quite naturally because I see, quite clearly, a scene in our garden in forty years time. You will be reading these letters and I shall be gardening, and I shall come over to you with the loveliest rose I can find. As I pin it to your shawl, I can see you look up and hear you say, ‘Darling, what silly children we were to think that a mere war would alter our love for each other!’ And I shall kiss you, because I shall still love you ….

  This need to reassure each other that everything would be unaltered and that they could pick up the threads of their lives without a problem, hid the worries and doubts that assailed most of the men on the Orbita. The long period of separation had put an enormous strain on relationships and many did not survive. Seeking the comfort of fellow victims, ‘The Jilted Lovers’ Club’ sprang up after a batch of recent mail was received.

  Airmail 5 In the Gulf of Tunis 2.X1.45

  My Dearest One,

  I was awakened early this morning to see Pantellaric, the much bombed island, which constituted our first stepping stone across the Med from Tunisia to Italy. I stuck my head out of the porthole and there saw a dark mass of mountains surrounded by a leaden sea. Two lighthouses twinkled. I recovered my head and laid back on the pillow. So that was Pantellaric.

  We passed Malta in the darkness and saw only its lighthouse. This morning, after Pantellanic, came Cap Bon, where the Germans staged an unsuccessful ‘Dunkirk’, while being thrown out of Tunisia. The islands of Zambretta and Zambra were very near. Another fine sight this morning was the P & O Corfu, outward bound with troops. This was the first vessel to arrive in the UK with POWs. Her present passengers are dead quiet and did not answer our shouts and taunts. They did not, apparently, need to be told they were going the ‘wrong way’.

  Last night THE JILTED LOVERS’ CLUB held its first meeting. This organisation came into being after Suez, when it was discovered that about a hundred men had heard that either their wives had been unfaithful or that their girls had married someone else. The Club fortified itself with beers and a pleasant evening was passed singing ‘Somebody Stole My Gal’, ‘Thanks for the Memory’, ‘Alone’ and other applicable tunes. A resolution was passed asking the Captain to turn back to Bali or some other destination where love is cheap, if not free. Everyone seemed in high spirits, and no one could see that tears were not far below the surface.

  I hope to post these letters in Gibraltar.

  Sweeping Labour gains at the Municipal Elections! Up go the rates. I see that President Truman has made a speech, in which he says that it is essential that American industry is freed from Government control as soon as possible, so that private enterprise and competition may advance the country’s commerce. We in England are doing the opposite thing. Undoubtedly we shall realise our mistake, but how long will that be? And how many markets will America have
captured?

  I hope the big storm which is raging around the British Isles is clearing up. The Captain said yesterday that the danger of bitting storm-loosened mines is a very real one.

  Oo ur …

  Weekly 30 Off Spain 4.X1.45

  My Beloved,

  It thrills me to think that at this time next Sunday I shall be with you.

  Along our starboard beam is a magnificent sight – the high Sierra Nevadas, with the peaks covered with snow.

  The sun catches the white and gives a warning as to what is waiting for us in a European winter. We are well in shore and the fresh wind seems to contain in it the clean nip of the snow.

  We reach Gibraltar about 9pm – a great nuisance not getting there in daylight. The difference in the ‘growing dark’, times seem very strange after our sojourn in areas where darkness falls at the same time all the year round.

  The sea is green today and decidedly choppy. The Orbita ploughs through it with scarcely a movement. She is wonderfully steady. Thirty years ago, when she was built, they built deep draughted ships to go through the seas; now they build light shallow vessels to go over the sea in search of speed and yet more speed. The Orbita is as deep draughted as the Queen Mary, although only a 1/5th of her size!

  I have got some tins of grapefruit juice for you. This was issued in the Red Sea, where one’s blood is liable to get overheated. You must be in need of citrus juices after so long without oranges and lemons etc.

  Weekly 31

  We pulled into the Bay at Gibraltar, paused long enough for mail to be hoisted on board and went out again straight away. A wonderful sight, Louie, but a nuisance that it wasn’t daylight. There was no moon and the dark mass of the Rock could only be seen against the star spangled velvet of the heavens as a black mass, forbidding and grim. Around the base, sending hundreds of gleaming, twinkling fairy lights across the water, was the town itself, glittering lights, which got fewer and fewer as they ascended the hill. Finally, they lost themselves in the blackness, where only one or two lights showed, where gunners kept guard in the passages and tunnels of the Rock itself.

  There was not a lot of mail – one for me to be exact and, of course, from your dear self. I had a good laugh at one or two points. Why? I shall tell you.

  Do you remember walking through York on our last Sunday? The subject of driving was mentioned and you said you were going to start lessons – that week, I understood. The years pass. On 22 Oct 1945, you blithely inform me that you are about to take your final lesson! I rather saw the funny side of a 4 years driving course. No-it’s all right, dear-I’m not puzzled – I realise you must have postponed your course! Now I wonder if it is a civilian or military course? The Nips got my driving licence at Singapore. I wonder whether I shall have to pass one of these tests if I take out another? Anyway, I can’t quite see us having a car yet awhile. A house and home comes first on the bill, doesn’t it?

  The other thing that tickled me was the mention of chocolate. Here am I, studiously saving every issue, buying all I can and generally hoping to give you a sweet surprise and there you are doing exactly the same thing for me. You really are a sweet darling. Louie, don’t you think that this little incident is symbolical of all that we intend our married life to be? We both like chocolate. We both know each other likes it, and so we put each other first and, quite in ignorance of each other’s actions, do our best to make our partner happy.

  I am sorry to hear about Winnie O’Grady, with whom I had a very slight acquaintance. She seemed a decent kid. I note you say ‘she is divorced’. I wonder whether you mean that literally or whether she divorced her husband. I know that there are heaps of matrimonial troubles. Two officers found out that they were girl-less last night. ‘The jilted Lovers Club’ had a real session again last night and invited Col.Toosey as honorary member. They successfully drowned their sorrows.

  Louie, beloved wife, we’ve got to make a success of our married life. Failure would be a stigma on each of us, which we should bear for life. There will be difficulties, problems, disappointments for us to face. Let’s always pause and look back on the last few years and realise that nothing could be quite so bad or unpleasant or as dangerous as these last few years.

  I think our first big problem will be our first home. I think it is essential to get away from the family roof tree as soon as possible. I expect it will be a temporary home, because we are not likely to find the house we want during the great housing shortage. What do you think? Have Iris and Albert their own house now, or are they renting one? Anyway, we should have a little capital to start with!! I always intended to save all my pay, but I never realised that I should be forced to do so! I wonder if you have found it possible to put anything by for the bottom draw? I fully realise that your living expenses have been high, but I am content in the knowledge that you have probably lived as well, if not better, than most people in England during these war years and that is what matters. My own mother died as a direct result of privations during 1914–18.

  So, you were scared of the V1’s! I should have been, too! When I think about the RAF’s raids, I break out into a cold sweat – which is just about the same thing as your hot ones.

  Silk stockings are definitely off – all over the world.

  At Colombo they were not obtainable without Ceylon Govt. coupons and printed fabrics are also rationed. They were lisle, anyway, and cost 11/-pair.

  At Suez they were unobtainable – and the bumboats brought more out at Port Said, which means there weren’t any. There are no stockings in Thailand, except possibly American ones in Bangkok. Girls simply don’t wear them. Ref, your legs – they will do whether they are covered or not – but preferably uncovered. Louise, I dare not put my thoughts down on paper. We have waited a long while and it seems incredible that soon I shall feel the glorious softness of your body close to mine again. I cannot tell you how many times I have relived our most intimate moments or the lasting happiness that you gave me in those never to be forgotten moments in August ’41. I am terribly pleased that I didn’t go abroad early in ’41. Louie, you are very dear to me. And you are getting nearer, nearer, nearer every day.

  Weekly 32 Off Portugal 6.X1.45

  My Dearest,

  A great glow in the night sky was all we saw of Lisbon last evening. Today, the weather has freshened, the wind has grown colder and the Atlantic is its typical self, with its great green walls of water following each other towards the distant cliffs of Portugal. The rollers aren’t so large as the great green mountains, which tossed the Sobieski about off Newfoundland in 1941, but they are big enough. On the Sobieski, one could stand on the boat deck and be completely unable to see the rest of the convoy except through the watery valleys. One’s plate was put before one on the long table. Whoosh! About a dozen plates passed before one in quick succession. Whoosh! Back they came t’other way. It was rather like a cafeteria, except that the food moved and the recipient sat still … It isn’t so bad yet, but, of course, we’re not in the Bay of Biscay yet.

  We reach Liverpool late on Thursday night, but do not tie up at the landing stage until 2pm on Friday. I understand that the Orbita will ‘dress ship’ as she comes up the Mersey and a reception of kinds awaits us. I am all for cutting out the nonsense and getting home. I believe we go the Huyton camps.

  I must phone you as soon as possible. What time shall we be free to phone? Will you have left the telephone address you have given me if it is late? Will there be telephones available in the Camp? When shall we leave for London? Will the ‘processing’ go on all night, leaving us free to travel on Saturday, or do we sleep on Friday night and go through the administrative processes during Saturday –making it Saturday night before we get away? When can you get away from Liverpool? I am determined to arrive after you at Shirley, because I have a great desire that you should be the one to open the door yourself. I understand from the Colonel, who has a Liverpool paper describing the arrival of the Tegelbourg, that special trains to the various dis
tributing centres start from Huyton itself and that we are not allowed into Liverpool.

  All these queries will be solved and answered within the next three days, so we won’t worry about them. Au revoir, dear.

  The Orbita picked up her pilot at Port Lynas, off Anglesey, and guided her up the River Mersey. The Orbita was dressed overall and all the way up the Mersey she was greeted with sounds of dozens of sirens and horns from the ships that lined the docks. At 2.30 p.m., the Orbita tied up and there to greet her at the dockside, were large crowds, cheering, shouting, laughing and crying.

  In a quiet corner of a dockside shed, I found Louie.

  Postscript

  So Louise and Charles were reunited in a typically calm and quiet way. By coincidence, Captain Louise Steel and her company were stationed at Liverpool and had been involved in the details of the Orbita’s homecoming. After a brief parting, during which they rejoined their units, they were able to enjoy a lengthy leave together.

  Finally demobbed in early 1946, Charles treasured the reference that Colonel Toosey gave him.

  B.S.M. Charles W. Steel was under my command from 1st September 1941 until 19th November 1945.

  Before the Regiment went into action, he was a most valued and experienced NCO. During the battle of Malaya, he proved his worth conclusively. He did many responsible jobs excellently and with great courage.

  During the long period when we were POWs in Japanese bands, he carried out his duties in a most loyal and efficient manner. He never relaxed his high standard of behaviour for one moment under the most difficult conditions imaginable. I gave him most responsible jobs to do, which he invariably carried out in the most satisfactory way. He is a fine man, of sterling character. I cannot speak too highly of his character.

  Toosey, Lt-Col.R.A.

  Cmdg 135 Field Regiment R.A.

  Apart from attending the Victory Parade through London, this was about the last connection Charles had with the military. His application to wear the Territorial Army Long Service medal was refused, as he had missed out on its entitlement by a few months. Disappointed rather than surprised, he made a conscious effort to put his war experiences behind him and to focus on the future with Louise. He never joined a veterans’ association nor participated in any reunions. Instead, he went about making up for lost time and rebuilding his life.